Czech News Network (CNN) HQ

Information and History:

Czech News Network is a dedicated news service based in Prague, they have been serving the Czech area for over 200 years, their initial news service called "Sausages Daily" which reported on local Butchers and Slaughter houses for quality Sausage. Creator Václav Fruit II born in lower Bohemia passed down his legacy to Václav Fruit III whom turned the newspaper around and made it into general Czech news(now reporting on both Sausage and Pornstars). The Czech News Network was a very successful news outlet, however there was trouble afoot, "Slovakia Today" had expanded from Slovakian Sausages to Czech Sausages, and was now reporting on Czech pornstars as well. Luckily there was a fire which happened to destroy their HQ in the Czech Republic, many speculated that Václav Fruit III may have had something to do with it, however I can confirm he did not. Václav Fruit III passed away recently and left his possessions to his greatest of Nephews, Grand Vizier Fruit. As he had no legal heir, I was the next in line. I am happy to announce that today is the start of a golden dawn for CNN! Under my leadership we will be the #1 news outlet in all of AW, and will never forget our core values of Zizouism which will keep us from being corrupted like the other biased news outlets around.

Staff:

CEO and Publisher of CNN: Fruit
CFO(Chief Financial Officer): Aristosseur
Fact Czecher and public complaints officer: Vaglneer
Chief Editor: Pulse
Executive Editor: Barrymore
Columnists:
Vaglneer - Sports
Aristosseur, Fruit - Advice (feel free to send me a PM in hopes to get your questions answered in the newspaper in the next issue)
Carthias - Reporter
Reckoner - Reporter
Houdini - Weather, with a chance of sipping
and finally with our food columnist, Vaglneer and his KFC Korner

Staff positions are still available, pm me or post below for more details of open positions or to request a new one

So we got the Afterwind Times, Afterwind News Network and now the Czech News Network. Whats the difference, or whats new about this compared to AT or ANN?

While AW Times and ANN are semi legitimate this one is obviously just for the lols.

EDIT: And Empire SRB propaganda.

Napisano przez Hugosch, 24.09.2012 at 07:19

So we got the Afterwind Times, Afterwind News Network and now the Czech News Network. Whats the difference, or whats new about this compared to AT or ANN?

this one has more pornstars and sausage

also you'll have to see the difference in our first issue

Napisano przez Acquiesce, 24.09.2012 at 07:27

While AW Times and ANN are semi legitimate this one is obviously just for the lols.

EDIT: And Empire SRB propaganda.

no this one will be legitimate and have no propaganda whatsoever

Please remove me from your post. Thanks.

No.

Vag is alive ?? Another fail KFC drive-by

I thought the ANN Team were gone and I was like "Yay we will rule AW" . Now we may have to compete once more.

Thing is,

This "CNN" will either flop, or Flop.

Napisano przez Guest, 27.09.2012 at 13:05

I thought the ANN Team were gone and I was like "Yay we will rule AW" . Now we may have to compete once more.

Thing is,

This "CNN" will either flop, or Flop.

I'm not gone

Czech News Network was DDoSed by the anonymoose, sorry, our report will instead air tomorrow.

How do I subscribe for the weekly posts?

BREAKING NEWS:

while we wait for Gardevoir to write his fashion article (as per contract) CNN will still bring you news as it come.

Tzeentch demodded?

earlier today an anonymous fan reported that it was possible Tzeentch had lost his moderator position.

CNN'S interpretation of the event

Whether true or not, CNN would like to remind you that CNN was the first one to report on this and therefore is the best news network.

EDIT: confirmed tzeentch no longer mod


(actual events)

Editors notes: that's too bad, I only just now learned his name completely

Http://gruenesbarett.de/images/barett_gruen_2.gif

nexttime use this hat pls, thx

That feel when I inspired 3 news networks, even though my network was active for less than a week.

And for the record, WE ARE NOT FOX NEWS. OR WERE. I included the catchphrases of MSNBC, Fox, and CNN. Just putting that out there.

Edit: Support, by the way.

Napisano przez Mathdino, 14.10.2012 at 06:51

That feel when I inspired 3 news networks, even though my network was active for less than a week.

In technicality I inspired you which inspired the other 3. So in a sense I inspired 4 News Stations. If you don't believe do feel free to check the dates of when the topics were made. Oh how I would love for you to say I'm right.

Napisano przez Reporter, 14.10.2012 at 15:20

Napisano przez Mathdino, 14.10.2012 at 06:51

That feel when I inspired 3 news networks, even though my network was active for less than a week.

In technicality I inspired you which inspired the other 3. So in a sense I inspired 4 News Stations. If you don't believe do feel free to check the dates of when the topics were made. Oh how I would love for you to say I'm right.

Actually, I had no idea your news channel existed when I started my interviewing. I'm not so obsessed with the Afterwind forums to dig through topics that are over 5 months old, lol. When I said I was going to start a news network, that's when you showed me yours, which then inspired you to restart it. So I inspired your rebirth, FYI.

P.S. NEVAH!

Napisano przez Mathdino, 14.10.2012 at 21:15

So I inspired your rebirth, FYI.

Actually, I would've brought it back anyway. You just made me do it faster cos afraid you would steal my jobs.

p.s. SAY IT!!!!

Gardevoir still on strike, where is our fashion article Gard? We can't print without it.

Also CNN was the first, as you can tell by the history portion at the top, just wasn't international at the time.

Napisano przez Fruit, 15.10.2012 at 23:41

Also CNN was the first, as you can tell by the history portion at the top, just wasn't international at the time.

Ya see dat we're talkin bout news on AW. And frankly CNN was not on AW before the "Afterwind News Channel." Thus meaning I was the first and I win the influence game.

Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz and Isaac Newton invented calculus independently, about 8 years apart. As far as we know, Leibniz had no idea what Newton was doing in England, and both can technically claim they discovered it. However, it raises the question as to whether Leibniz was influenced by Newton.

I had no idea your news channel existed when I started ANN. Remember the conversation we had when I was first starting it up? However, in the half week that I spent on it, I got it stickied, got PoTM partially because of it, and inspired CNN and the extremely popular Afterwind Times. Or at least the Afterwind Times.

I feel like I'm starting a Mathdino version of a Gardethread. Why are we even arguing about this on another guy's network...?

Napisano przez Mathdino, 16.10.2012 at 18:51

I feel like I'm starting a Mathdino version of a Gardethread. Why are we even arguing about this on another guy's network...?

So would that be called a Maththread then?

Napisano przez Mathdino, 16.10.2012 at 18:51

I had no idea your news channel existed when I started ANN. Remember the conversation we had when I was first starting it up? However, in the half week that I spent on it, I got it stickied, got PoTM partially because of it,

I remember you looking at the thread long before you made ANN. Everyone who uses the forums did. You just may not remember it is all.

As for the "Maththread," that name just sounds gay. No offense though.

Agreed. My analysis of ARB was a Maththread. This is a Dinothread.

Guys stop bantering about your 2 news channels on another news channels thread. I take back what I said about this news, seems to be legit

LilD and Math, stop arguing about each others news channels. The point of one is to have fun and the competition it creates is supposed to be fun too. If you do want to argue then make PM messages towards each other and fight through there but not over someone's news channel.

Napisano przez Guest, 18.10.2012 at 00:34

If you do want to argue then make PM messages towards each other and fight through there but not over someone's news channel.

*Makes a spam bot to do it for him*

Semi-BREAKING NEWS:

Gardevoir calls it quits? and

Nightmare on Elme Street



Gardevoir has quit for the fourth....fifth.....sixth? VAGlNEER fact czech that for me, thanks.
Now due to the event, some speculation has come up regarding Gardevoir. Why would Gardevoir send out this contact info to people who aren't his friends saying they were? During an anonymous survey 73% of the people asked responded "well he's gay, so maybe he wants people to sign his email up for one of those gay porn sites like people over the internet usually do when they see an email of someone they don't like". The other 27% said "Who's Gardevoir?" Today CNN will be doing a deeper look into this question, Who exactly is/was Gardevoir?

Gardevoir was born Marsher Brucie Mathdino III on October 17, 1972, in Saint Joseph, Missouri, the only child of Deborah R. (Nelson) Mathdino-Briggs and Marsher Brucie Mathdino, Jr. He is of Scottish, English, German, Swiss, Polish, and Luxembourgian ancestry. His father abandoned the family when he was 18 months old, and he was raised solely by his mother. By the age of 12, Gard and his mother had moved between various cities and towns in Missouri (including Saint Joseph, Savannah, and Kansas City) before they settled in Warren, Michigan, and in Gards' teenage years, Detroit.

As a child, Gardevoir developed an interest in storytelling and aspired to become a comic book artist before discovering Afterwind. When Gardevoir was around 11 years old, his maternal uncle Ronald "Mcdonald" Nelson introduced him to the musical genre after giving him a copy of Aristosseur's single "Phantom of the Pera". After obtaining a copy of the greatest hits: Musicals as a teenager, Gardevoir became interested in music, performing amateur musicals at age 14 under the pseudonym "Gard and pals" and joining the group called "The Entente" and released their second EP, Y'ou do'nt kn'ow m'e. They later changed their name to "Soul Entente" and around 1995 they released their first single called "Fuckin' Backstabber"(about how he always gets backstabbed when he allies everyone in a game) under the record label y r gay y play music Records. Although he was enrolled at Lincoln High School in Warren, he frequently participated in freestyle musicals at the now-defunct Osborn High School on Detroit's east side. Despite a well-documented struggle succeeding in a predominantly gay industry, he gained the approval of underground musical audiences. After repeating the ninth grade twice due to truancy and near-failing grades, he dropped out of high school at age 17 to play Afterwind full time.

In 2011, Gardevoir was buttdevastated by the suicide of his uncle. He has a tattoo reading "Ronnie Mcdonald R.I.P." on his upper left arm. Ronnie was mentioned in the songs "imp PakiStan," "Cleanin' Out My Colon," and "My Dad's Gone Crazy".

In 2012 he was still "playing"(posting on the forums all day and not doing anything else) AW, having quit many times but returned dramatically. Until yesterday that is, when he finally said this was the end..for serious guys..

Now onto Elme

What do we know of him? Well he had a job and recently quit; the same day Gardevoir quit.

Could it be that his previous job was in the musical arts? Our experts say YES!
Gardevoir has been known to have multiple personalities, even self proclaiming it to be so. Is it possible that he could have swayed Ivan with one of his personalities named Elme? Maybe Ivan/Amok knew this was Gardevoir and kept it secret due to the fact it would be Child Labor. This would also explain why they made a very specific age restriction in their replacement thread. This is all we were able to tie together with regarding the current situation, but we find it to be undisputed fact. I'll leave the rest to your own speculation, please leave comments with your thoughts.


Czech News Network will report on any new developments, thank you for reading.
-Fruit, prophet of CNN

Lol'd

You forgot the part where I introduced him to "Hopsin" and he now likes Hopsin.


p.s. why so many "Reporter"? (ba dum tsss)

Loling so hard .
By the way you only made CNN for scoffing, right?

Napisano przez Guest, 06.11.2012 at 08:57

Loling so hard .
By the way you only made CNN for scoffing, right?

you can count it as a comedy news outlet, because I usually do report important stuff before the others.